Resuming Lesbian Sex after birth.

 How soon can I resume lesbian sex after giving birth?

  
Regardless of the sex of your partner, healing – both physically and emotionally - after birthing is paramount to resuming satisfying, enjoyable sex.  Most women resume penetrative sex as soon as they have stopped bleeding, the inflammation has eased and the stitches have gone.  There is a growing number of women who decide to opt for anal sex whilst their vaginas heal click here for an article on Anal Sex after birthing. However, what most people miss the point in – is the reconnection between the partners; before genuine intimacy can be instigated.

 Resuming lesbian sex after giving birth is no different to becoming intimate again with a male partner.  Cuddling, kissing and exploring each others bodies by gentle touch aught to be the main stay of reconnection of intimacy between two people from day one.

 For most women, resuming penetrative vaginal sex is around the 6 week mark as most women are physically ‘fit’ after a natural birth. (that is if you birthed naturally and with little or no tears.. if you have a c section or had extensive tearing and stitches,  then the time will be pushed out and dependant upon the mothers health, diet, stress levels and recovery) Physically at the six week mark,  your uterus will be back to a 'normal' size ( again dependant upon hormones, breastfeeding or not etc) and are medically are ‘fit’ to commence intimate relations. Generally speaking, oral sex should be avoided until full healing has occurred.

 Other options for lesbian couples would be to engage in tribadism or to whisper sexual fantasies to one another. Tribadism ; also called humping; involves rubbing your genitals against another person's genitals and involves straddling a partner's leg, pubic bone or any other body part. Many lesbians enjoy as it involves their whole bodies and allows them to fully explore the others body. Many women can orgasm just from this stimulation as long as the action was not too rough on the clitoris, could suit many women waiting to heal internally.

 Regardless if it is with a female partner, a male partner or if using a sex toy, the first penetrative sexual encounter after birthing needs to be nice and slow, using a good quality lubricant and  conducted with a great deal of gentleness. Be prepared to stop if things don't feel right ( and they might or might not..) Internal tears can take longer to heal – so be mindful of what your body is telling you.

 Be gentle with one another when trying different positions as muscles have been fatigued and tendons stretched – what might have been a favourite spot before birthing, might now be painful or uncomfortable.

 Get to know your partners body again, getting to know how to turn her on and learning what your chemistry is will be all part of rediscovering each other and reclaiming your sensuality and sexuality back after birthing. Orgasm may or may not happen the first time. Either is normal. The point is to get physical, get close, express your feelings of love or desire again with your partner.

 It is wrong – for the relationship and for the person involved - to have sex out of feelings of guilt, or out of feelings of service. Sex is a beautiful sharing between two people and if you have sex just because you think you ‘aught to’ or that the 6 week mark has come up – then you are doing yourself, your loving partner and your relationship a great disservice. You need to be ready – as does your partner – so there is no ‘right time’ – except YOUR time. There are women who are ready to have sex immediately after birthing and there are women who want nothing to do with sex for month afterwards - both are right in their own situations.

 The sexual nature of birth cannot be denied.  It will open paths and closed doors in ones mind and forces you to  explore the meanings you place upon experiences in relation to sex. EMOTIONALLY and PHYCOLOGICALLY things shift a lot and it is a journey in reclaiming your sexuality – for both men and women and regardless of your sexual preferences and regardless to who the birthing woman was in the relationship.

 Reclaiming your sexuality can be a wonderful adventure – so don’t treat it as a chore or something that you just gotta do – enjoy the journey!