Reclaim Sex After Birth

If you are challenged by finding the time and place to re-connect romantically as you are too busy with caring for small children, then your relationship will benefit greatly by an enhancement of creativity.

It is easy to forget to seduce your partner once settled into a routine. Simple delicious food, created with love and intention in an unhurried manner is the best aphrodisiac in existence.

In our new mini-ebook “Recipes For Passion” we have put together ideas to inspire you and rekindle the flame of passion.

- How to enjoy a romantic meal at home for busy parents

- 7 easy tips for table settings that engage the senses

- 3 seductive spices

- A sensual yet simple 3 course dining experience

For more romantic recipes:

The Valentine Foods of Love Aphrodisiac Recipes is where you will find a mixture of sweet and savory concoctions designed to put you (and your lover) in the mood using aphrodisiac foods such as asparagus, figs, oysters, mushrooms, lobster, chocolate, banana, strawberries. Definitely a great place to stop for last minute romantic meal inspirations!

An entire book devoted to the art of sensual cooking, InterCourses: An Aphrodisiac Cookbook is definitely worth a look. The book itself is filled with recipes and tales of the couples who’ve put them to work. The InterCourses Web site includes must-see pictures from the book and a selection of exotic recipes including Creamy Stuffed Figs, Honey Glazed Salmon, Basil Fritatta Hero and Black Russian Cake.

The European Gastronomy Site details the history of aphrodisiac cooking, complete with sensual recipes and stories of love potions from the temples of Eros, Aphrodite and Dionysus. Help bring to life the almost magical effect of otherwise standard fare.

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Hormone levels in pregnant and recently birthed women goes from one extreme to the other. These massive hormonal changes directly effect mood, the way a woman reacts to events and the meaning she places on things that are said and done ( and NOT said and NOT done..)

The main hormone produced during pregnancy is progesterone and this steadily rises as pregnancy progresses. It is matched with the rising production of estrogen – and this huge gushing and influx through the day, throughout pregnancy; is responsible for the myriad of emotions experienced by the pregnant and new mother.

Many women feel very sexy, within their feminine power whilst they are pregnant. Some lose any inhibitions they may have had ( especially with body image) and passionate, loving sex ensues. Of course there is the other end of the spectrum where the male partner may be repelled at their partners shape or have emotional issues with the changing nature of their partner, or a woman who either through dreadful morning sickness, emotional trauma or exhaustion, has their sex drive drop below zero.

Hormone levels rapidly decrease after birthing, and dependant upon the health of the woman, may fall contributing to PND and adjustment issues. After birthing you still produce estrogen, but much less progesterone. If a woman is not eating healthful foods, resting and feeling nurtured, it may lead to the hormones becoming out of balance or having “Too much estrogen” in the world of medicine is called - “estrogen dominance”. ( Look it up – but amongst the list of complaints is LOW SEX DRIVE)

Again – on the other hand, there are women who birth and feel very empowered, their sex drive kicks in and are ready to go! There really isn’t a ‘norm’ here. Throughout pregnancy and after birthing, it is very important to nurture the new mother and allow her to know that its normal to have these feelings of being overwhelmed, to keep up the intimacy, gentle touches etc. Having a strong relationship with clear communication and thoughtfulness on the part of each partner is the key. Both may be feeling confused, exhausted or excited and the loving touch is a gentle reminder that they are not alone. Allow the pace to go where it will, with no judgments. A rejection of sex is not a rejection of the person. It’s a ‘Not now or Not in this space or Show me you really love me” message. This is where you need to be familiar with your partners primary “Love Language” – so that you can indulge each other in the way that you feel loved and they receive love.

It seems likely from research, that loss of libido has as much to do with the imbalance of hormones than it does with anything else.

Hormone imbalance and the symptoms surrounding this is caused when your main hormones production has changed - usually due to a lifestyle change (birthing, change of diet, change of job and stress etc) and from the changes which happen in the reproductive cycle during your life.

In a perfect world, where you eat organic, healthful wholefoods, drink plenty of pure water and live a stress free life in an nontoxic environment, the normal menstrual cycle, only estrogen is produced for the first 10-12 days. Ovulation then tells the female body to produce progesterone, and the hormones are in balance. Happy days!

Progesterone sustains the endometrium, so it can receive a fertilized egg if pregnancy occurs. If there’s no pregnancy, then the body stops producing both hormones, and menstruation occurs. However, if there is no ovulation ( which occurs through a number of factors, including toxicity in the body, stress, eating food which are not supportive etc etc ) then the body has too much estrogen (already produced for that month) as its not balanced by progesterone (only be produced with ovulation.) During pregnancy too, the hormones are producing like crazy, and in some cases after birthing, this production can go either way – by continuing or completely stopping. PLUS by the time you are in your mid 30s, you still produce estrogen, but less progesterone. In each of these cases, having “Too much estrogen” in the world of medicine is called - “estrogen dominance”.

Estrogen dominance causes the following list of complaints: Hair Loss, fibrocystic breasts, uterine fibroids, accelerated aging process, breast cancer, polycystic ovaries, mood swings, osteoporosis, uterine cancer, memory loss, endometrial cancer ,bone loss PMS, low sex drive, allergies thyroid dysfunction, water retention, bloating and unexplained weight gain ( just what we all need!)

In the medical world, if your blood tests show that you are estrogen dominant, then you may be prescribed a number of things, including synthetic hormone replacements. Explore natural supplements and supportive remedies in conjunction with western medicine as well as looking at your lifestyle and your choices. Many petrochemical based products have estrogen-like and toxic effects on the body, especially in unborn children. Examples of these are the many household cleaners, soaps, herbicides and sprays commonly used at home. A simple change to make is to begin using toxic free cleaning products. ( just because something is labeled ‘natural’ does not mean its not toxic – so do your research thoroughly)

The lack of hormones will reduce the secretions of lubricant which would normally be there and those ‘sexy’ feelings when touched - anywhere. It will more likely be replaced with feelings of resentment and frustration; and one which is not a healthy anchor for future relationships. Medically it is suggested that you grab the tube of lubricant and use it liberally. This will assist in the short term, but you need to get those hormones sorted out…!!

So any woman whose sex drive isn’t up to much should take a very careful look at her lifestyle and food and environmental choices – before thinking that nothing can be done. It is true that you are guided by your hormones ( your emotions, mood swings, the way you react to events), but you also have the opportunity to get them back into balance and start feeling “balanced” and more at peace again.